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Identifying unhealthy coping mechanisms


Lis

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Guest Deblynnnnnnn

This is my very first post and my first attempt at talking about my problems.. With other people that are in the same boat a me. I've tried therapy and I don't know why I failed at that.. I have a laundry list of unhealthy ways of coping and after thirty plus years it's become normal and I still feel like I'm being judged everywhere I go. In a room of people I don't know.. I feel like they are looking at me and talking about me. 

Drinking too much at once.. Not often but when I do. I go overboard 

Avoiding people, situations, and isolating myself. 

Pushing away loved ones. 

trust.. I don't have any

self esteem.. I forget to eat or I eat too much. 

putting myself down in a joking manner 

sleep.. I can't dwell or think while I'm asleep 

Drugs.. Xanax.. Adavan. Pot

creating a problem when there isn't one because I don't know what to do with myself unless there is a certain amount of chaos in my life. 

moving from thing to thing because nothing makes me happy or feel full or complete. 

there are more.. I have never dealt with any of my encounters and blame myself for a lot of it. I just want to talk to someone who knows what it's like to feel like you are standing on the outside of the circle and someone who created a cycle of bad choices because that is what you do.. That is how you cope. That is how I coped and still do and I don't want to anymore. I want to talk to someone who truly really understands. My husband is compassionate and kind and tries but he does not get it. I love him for trying but he can't possibly. 

 

Don't even know what to call myself

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  • 11 months later...
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Guest AmberA

First, I am super grateful for some distraction in life.  Stuff can be heavy at times, and there is nothing like a comedy to lighten the load.  

I think I can make anything an unhealthy cooping mechanism.  Drugs, booze, exercise, eating, television, movies, serial netflix, school, work, etc.... I know when I am going to far with something and there is an imbalance.   Sometimes it takes me a while to change gears and balance out.  I think noticing it and finding ways that work for you to come back to balance is helpful.  I have used all kinds of methods like group therapy, therapy, spiritual learning, meditation, journals, friend therapy, hiking, setting limits, and making time to process everything so I am not in a constant state of avoidance.  Sometimes I just sit with my thoughts until these clear by hiking or listening to music without words.  When I clear my mind even just a little, I find balance is an easier goal.   

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