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What are your healing ACCOMPLISHMENTS?


linnea
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This is a great thread. I'm proud of these things.

1. I've stayed alive.

2. I understood that I had been sexually abused.

3. I admited that it wasn't my fault.

4. I stopped dating and being friends with the abusive guy and admited that at least sometimes, I hate him.

5. I joined Pandys.

6. I wrote and posted about my bad relationship here and another site.

7. I don't feel so ashamed of being weak, having panic attacks and crying sometimes than I used to be.

8. I've been to a psychiatrist and tried to get to therapy.

9. I told about my experiences and problems to strange professionals.

10. I also told some of it to my friends, mother and Grandma.

11. I could begin a new relationship with a wonderful guy (though the relationship ended later).

12. I've been able to enjoy another person's closeness a little.

13. I've learnt to trust people more than before.

14. I've helped some other people with problems giving them a little comfort and/or advice.

15. I was accepted to a school to study arts and media although I haven't recovered from the abuse and some other things and felt sick and sad in the test.

16. I draw well and write too, both about the abuse and other things.

17. I'm rediscovering my sexuality and learning to like it instead of being ashamed of it.

18. I'm looking forward to really being able to enjoy sex with a person I love.

19. Sometimes I can smile.

Edited by Elfstar
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crissibear23

Some of my healing accomplishments:

I've told my husband (almost) everything that happened.

I've stuck it out with T even though I thought I couldn't.

I've shared my story on Pandy's.

I'm starting to deal with it rather than trying to push it aside.

I know that I want to live.

I have reported.

I went to a doctor...even if it was a couple of weeks later.

I'm starting to recognize my triggers.

I'm starting to learn how to handle/work through my triggers.

I think that's all I have for now...but I'm shocked looking at this list at what I have accomplished so far.

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  • 2 years later...

My healing accomplishments would be that I have written about my feelings in this forum and I have readdressed the events of my abuse after a 9 year hiatus. Thanks for your time.

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It might not be a completed accomplishment (yet), but it's a step / part of my healing accomplishment....and that is to face therapy.

survivor

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  • 4 weeks later...

Probably seems like nothing compared to what other people have done but i was quite pleased with myself :P

I finally managed to tell my story out loud, including saying the R word, which i've never been able to do before. It took hours and i still have to get the last little bit done, which i will do sometime this week or next, then i can move on a bit hopefully, its only taken about 18 months :P

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  • 2 weeks later...
blondie2002

I've been able to stay alone in my apt @ night and not have it bother me.

I've been able to let my male friends and family members hug me and not get freaked.

My now former co-worker R is going off to college next week, and he said he wouldn't see me next wek and he asked if he could give me a :hug: and I was ok with it.

Edited by blondie2002
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motherearth

I worked in a hospital a couple of years after my r*pe. No one I worked with knew anything about it and I wanted to keep it that way. I got a call that there was a r*pe victim coming into ER and did I know anything about evidence collection? We had no female doctors and the woman refused to let a man touch her. Fortunately, I had a few minutes to try and stop shaking, throw up and get a drink of water( I'd have liked a shot of whiskey) before she came in. She reminded me so much of myself except her attacker had been a stranger. Once I started talking to her all my fears went away and I found I was able to relate to her on a deep emotional level and share that I'd been in her position and understood all too well what she was feeling. I spoke with her several time after that for support. The hardest thing for me was the next day when they brought in the man who r*ped her for evidence collection and I was asked to help with that. You can all imagine what I wanted to do to him! After he left I threw up again-mostly from the strain of holding in my fury. He eventually pleaded guilty saving her the agony of a trial.

Anyway with all this rambling, the most healing thing I've found is being able to help other women who've been assaulted. It's been 27 years next month and in that time I've talked to dozens of women. I no longer have any reservations about sharing my story. It wasn't my fault-which I've always known but the feeling of being "dirty and different" was still there. That's long gone-it's now just another thing that happened in my life, bad but not the worst thing as far as lasting effects.

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  • 1 year later...
blondie2002

Knowing there are probably always going to be triggers but knowing that I can handle anything becuase I love myself and I am so strong!

That sounds like me. :D I've also learned to relax around guys that I've known for a long time. (I'm still kinda :suspect: of ones that I barely know.)

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I've started my own business - as an artist

overcome my fear of the dark

gone to the police and he's behind bars now.

found my soul mate - still don't know why he puts up with me though

started writing

joined here and chatted to people after finally realizing I was living made up life.

started wearing my hair how I want to - not how my mother did.

asked for help when I needed it.

I hope to soon say I can sleep through the night.

thanks to every-one.

Flame

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allthatglitters

Face the truth. I'm still working on the self-blame, but it's only been 3 months for me.

Opening up to my friends and a few family members about what happened. Allowing them to support me and validate what happened to me.

I hope there will be more accomplishments for me in the future...

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I've moved out of my abusive grandmother's house and I now live 1000 miles away.

I'm working a full time job and providing for myself and my room mates.

I'm going to a therapist for counseling to work through my depression and PTSD.

I started taking a mild anti-depressant for my emotional unbalance, and it's helping me wonderfully.

I can look people in the eye again.

I'm drawing and writing and being creative again.

I'm less socially crippled and I don't flee the room at the slightest awkward moment anymore.

I went out on a limb and got half of my hair buzzed short in a punk style, despite the lingering thoughts that my grandmother would beat me for doing such a thing.

I've stopped wearing huge, frumpy clothes and I'm showing my curves again.

I've lost 30 pounds since this past November, just by eating healthier and drinking water.

I can cuddle with close friends and not flinch or shy away.

My nightmares have lessened drastically and my sleep has improved.

I don't feel hopeless and useless anymore.

I care about my appearance again. I like dressing up and putting on makeup and looking attractive, like I used to.

I can spend a day in public by myself and not hyperventilate.

SPOILER, highlight to show content

I can touch myself and feel pleasure from it, instead of feeling numb or disgusting.

I've improved this much in the course of 5 and a half months. :P

Edited by PandaFace
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blondie2002
Knowing there are probably always going to be triggers but knowing that I can handle anything becuase I love myself and I am so strong!

I'm hopeing for the exact same thing. :yay:

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  • 4 years later...

Mine has been time, recently opening up to a counselor and close friends (the past few years), and time. I still have a ways to go because I have never been with a man (since this happened to me when I was 9). At 23, I still have yet to have a relationship with a man. I think the worst part is actually admitting that I have a problem, so many years later, with trying to date, talk, and be intimate with men. But I have come a lot further than I was when I would have a panic attack before a date!

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  • 1 year later...

After being in sex therapy for 9 months (rape was 10 years ago), I had sex for the first time in 6 months with my husband. It's a HUGE accomplishment, as I've been not allowing myself to be sexual until I was ready again.

Hubby has been so wonderful and understanding. He has come to therapy with me and learned what actions make me uncomfortable and what works for me.

While it's a huge accomplishment, I'm still a little emotional about letting go one of the things that made me feel safe, which was abstaining. During and immidiately after I felt proud and accomplished. A few hours later I'm a little emotional .Trying to stay positive and realize what a milestone this actually is bc every step I took tonight I did not do until I felt ready. I am strong...

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  • 4 months later...

Met a person who changed my life forever, I told him and he is slowly helping me fix myself.. I don't have panic attacks every three hours, I don't panic in the shower as bad, and I try not to cry every night

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  • 1 year later...
angel.heart

I moved out of our father's house and moved in with a safe friend who accepts and understands my DID.

And as a result, my disability benefits went from US$30 to US$490.

It has been helping so much. I love being independent

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pursuinggrace

I am still here

 

 

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  • 2 weeks later...
Neptune.Midnight

My healing accomplishments:

- Seeing a therapist for 7 sessions.
- Putting dating on hold for several years.
- Making significant progress with overcoming my PTSD.
- My self-worth and self-esteem have increased immensely.
- Being able to help others and give people advice about the abusive situations they are going through. 
- Finding a boyfriend who treats me with respect (no verbal abuse, no psychological abuse, no domestic violence occurring)
- Becoming more emotionally and financially independent

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  • 1 year later...
Guest Santeria

I learned that I'm not crazy and my feelings are valid.

I feel my feelings instead of ignoring them.

I learned to accept and love myself and my own life.

I don't let other control my emotions.

I learned to detach from toxic relationships.

My passion for life is slowly coming back.

I take care of my body by working out and eating healthy.

I have connected to a Higher Power and journal everyday.

I'm finding myself again.

I'm finding peace and happiness :)

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  • 10 months later...
EsperanzaRising

Living on my own

Going to CSA group 

Starting to be open about myself in therapy 

Standing up to my parents

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  • 3 years later...
VirginiaW

 

It‘ s definitely a good day for healing accomplishments !

 

Being able to trust those I love and who love me

Being able to enjoy hugs

Being able to enjoy intimacy

Being able to laugh … and to cry

Being able to feel positive and negative

Being able to feel

Reconnecting with my body

Not zoning out

Controlling some triggers

Breathing some panic away

Being able to have my own family

Being able to see it was them, not me

Being able to talk about this night, even if it hurts

I can see and enjoy beauty

I can create

 

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DaisyDarling<3

Smiling at the mirror 

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